Intimidation Isn’t Leadership: How Fear-Based Management Destroys Communication, Culture, and Your Bottom Line

A friend recently collaborated with another organization for an event, and from start to finish, it was chaos. Misinformation, last-minute changes, constant confusion. At one point, a staff member from the other team quietly apologized and confided,

“I’m so sorry for the lack of clarity. I’m embarrassed to say this but it’s just very difficult to ask questions here.” Later on, someone else from their team communicated something similar.

And just like that, everything made sense. The missed details. The lack of clarity. The anxiety humming beneath every interaction.

It got me thinking: why are we still mistaking intimidation for leadership?

There’s a myth in the professional world that a “tough” leader is a strong leader. We’ve romanticized the idea of the brilliant-but-brutal boss—someone who keeps everyone on their toes, cuts through nonsense, and demands excellence.

But here’s the truth: fear doesn’t build excellence. It corrodes it.

Yes, these environments often come with the obvious issues:

• High turnover

• Low morale

• A constant drain on resources from rehiring and retraining

But the real damage is quieter. It’s insidious. And it often goes unnoticed, until everything falls apart.

What Really Happens in a Fear-Based Culture

When fear is in charge, people stop showing up as their full selves. They play small. They stay quiet. They hide mistakes instead of learning from them. They stop asking questions. They don’t take initiative. They wait to be told what to do, or worse, they make fear-based decisions that ripple out across teams and departments.

Blame becomes the default setting. No one takes responsibility because it doesn’t feel safe to own anything at all. And without responsibility, there’s no innovation. No problem-solving. No growth. Just festering issues and quiet resentment.

It might look “functional” on the surface but underneath? Everything is cracking.

Organizations are systems, just like families. And when one person in that system is feared, everyone else adapts—by shrinking, hiding, fawning, people-pleasing. Over time, the entire system becomes sick.

What Real Leadership Looks Like

Strong leaders create clarity. They invite input. They regulate their own emotions so others feel safe to bring theirs. They empower their teams to think, question, speak up, and lead.

They don’t create environments that depend on them; they build systems that work even when they’re not in the room.

The Devil Wears Prada isn’t a leadership strategy. It’s a red flag. If you’re in a position to hire, promote, or shape leadership culture, ask yourself:

Am I mistaking intimidation for leadership? Or am I cultivating the kind of leadership that empowers, inspires, and drives real change?